I remember getting into my last few years of high school and beginning to feel
this strange building pressure. Suddenly we had appointments with careers
advisors, classes on how to apply for university, tips on university interviews, the
list goes on. I realized quite early on that school definitely emphasized the
pathway of going to university. But what other options were out there? I began to
think I may not even want to go to university. I had subjects that I liked ,them
being geography and art but what could I do with these and what career would
these lead to? I took myself along to my schools career advisor for more
information… She chatted through my options- ‘with my grades I could definitely
get into university’…. There it was again …university…. That word. I sat politely
and listened. I began to think about why it was that I was unsure of university –
was it because I had no clue what I even wanted to study or was it something
deeper – the fear of not being good enough? Being totally honest with myself it
was definitely the latter. I was scared that I wasn’t good enough, that I wouldn’t
cope with academic life and lastly I was scared of failure.
Not long after I had a good chat with my mum and she asked me the best
question – she asked
“what makes you happy and what do you love doing at school?”
It didn’t take me long to answer it was and always had been art. After that I felt
much more happier and content… I decided I did want to go to university and to
go and study Art and Design. Now it wasn’t an easy process – I had to come up
with a portfolio of work , go to interviews etc. Pretty early on I decided I had my
heart set of the Edinburgh College of art. Their course was exactly what I was
looking for – plus I could stay living at home(at 17 I didn’t quite feel ready to
move out) After submitting my 5 applications to my chosen universities I waited
and waited. One afternoon I heard the ping of an email alert. I raced to open my
email and anxiously clicked open. It was from the Edinburgh college of art and
written in bold was Unsuccessful. I hadn’t got it. I was for a better word
devasted(sorry to be so dramatic) but when you plan and dream up what your
life might look like at this university its sad when you realise that dream is over. I
had a good week of crying and wallowing , with my mum taking me out for hot
chocolates to cheer me up(thanks mum) before I finally picked myself up. Not
long after I got another email this time it was good news! I had been offered an
unconditional offer to another university. It was not my first choice and probably
being honest not my second. But I had hope that this was meant to be. And now
looking back I can say it definitely was – this university was much smaller. It
meant I really got to know my classmates and got more hands on help from
lecturers. It turned out to be pretty perfect for me. I guess my story shows that
even though you might not get into the college or university you wanted,
something even better might be waiting right around the corner